Why Winter SUCKS

Winter sucks.
Winter especially sucks in Nunavut.

Why do I have these terrible feelings? My aggression started while one day trying to zip up my Canada Goose Jacket getting ready to go snowmobiling. Oh wait, hold on, I couldn't do it up. After about 10 mins awkwardly trying to zip up the black marshmallow sack over my already fat from overeating to counter act the lack of light body, I finally just took it off, zipped it up and pulled it over my head. Then when I went to do up the last bit around my neck, of course, every time, (Com'on ladies) get my hair violently ripped off of my head. Every time! It doesn't matter what coat I am wearing, I might as well be bald! Why did I think that keeping long hair for the winter was a good idea..."keep me warm", I told myself. Well screw that, having long hair and wearing anything with a zipper is a health hazard!

I am sick of strategically thinking about how I am going to dress up before going outside. You can't just throw shoes on and strut out. There is no freedom. I long for the days of flip flops. BUT before that even happens I will need to drill down my sand paper feet. WHERE IS THE MOISTURE!

The house is stale, I burn my hand when I touch the cold door handle, electrocute myself when I turn on or off the light switches or anything else after I shuffle my feet on the carpet, and my face burns when I go outside. I am too cold outside and too hot inside.

So after I am bald, frost burnt and crispy I will just be about ready for spring.